The Journal of Grimoire, chapter I

This is the journal of Grimoire, based on what Grimoire have seen or heard, including his thoughts on the matters at hand and the state of the world around him.


Raffolk Ginsi had gotten himself a serious problem. A 200 gold pieces or his life problem. The man is a gambler, and it appears that his debt have been accumulating over quite some time. The collector Gulfa, a brute of a Bugbear, made sure that the message was very clear. Personally, I think I would have handled the collecting of debt differently, an agreement that would have benefitted me over time, is more my style. Then again, I know a few of the types that venture the supposedly gilded halls of the Triple Nine gambling den, and not many of them would gladly accept a slow deal. They live fast, and apparently, they also die fast.

We walked together with Raffolk, after agreeing to help him. The colourful feather, according to our resident wildlife expert Riniya the Elf, was the feather of a Ko-attel (I do not know the spelling of this creature, nor am I aware of what this creature looks like, apart from it having feathers). I say was, as the fire that Gulfa caused utterly destroyed the beautiful feather and as such ruined Raffolk’s plans complete. These creatures are rarely seen, so their feathers are worth a small fortune to collectors. Indeed Lord Monder, the Crownwarden himself, was supposedly willing to pay upwards of 535 gold pieces for a single feather, more than twice the amount that Raffolk was needing to pay off his debt. Raffolk’s plan was simple; his grandmother had another of these feathers, heirlooms both of them, if only we provide the funding, to pay her, then we were promised the excess from the sale; by a quick estimate, upwards of 135 gold pieces. I’d like to consider myself a generous soul, within reason, so myself and Dande, a landlocked Haregon sailor with some grasp of magic, agreed to part with 100 gold pieces each. On top of Raffolk’s 50, this would suffice to appease his grandmother. I’d much rather that we had walked alongside Raffolk, to the Triple Nine and Gulfa, and paid directly, rather than letting a, potentially, priced heirloom go to waste, this would also have saved 50 gold pieces down the line. The feather of the grandmother looked a little different in colouration, but about the same size and glamour.

Raffolk said that Lord Monder would return with the money for the purchase, and suggested that we’d walk to his estate together. The Halfling appeared in greater spirits now, I reckon having a death threat removed can be rather uplifting, though I am in no rush to attempt such a feeling myself. En route to the Lord’s villa, we discussed the possibilities for Raffolk to avoid gambling in the future, he claimed to be of little skill in terms of practical jobs, but Dande suggested that he’d get in touch with some colleagues down at the harbour. From what little I know of seafaring, ship’s crews tend to be tightly knit, and most captains frown upon sailors gambling, even while docked. Any larger ship could always use an extra pair of hands, and while it can be mildly dangerous out at sea, it’s a job that builds character. Raffolk seemed not entirely displeased with the idea, though I don’t believe it exactly thrilled him either. Instead he seemed to want to steer the conversation towards the upcoming Day of the Crown festivities, namely the tournament.

I personally find bouts and tests of strength for the sake of public amusement to be rather barbaric, even if they are rooted in history. I’ll admit that I do find the cheaper food and drink to be quite a welcome gesture, but with all the rabble in the streets, it is difficult to find a nice and quiet place to settle down with a good book, or to finish up some case notes. People are significantly easier to interrogate though, albeit, too many drinks makes questioning a difficult task. And many a lowlife sees opportunity in the large gatherings, easy pickpockets and even break-ins, do tend to give a few extra cases in the coming weeks after.

The others in the group, to my utmost admiration, did not seem too approving of the tournament either. Dande pointed out that it was a bad habit of Raffolk’s, besides, the last couple of years, the king had won it himself. Among some of the more dubious gamblers, there have been talk that the tournament is actually fixed. It would be on the verge of impossibilities to actually prove, and I have not yet received an offer to take such a case. At least not one, that would truly pay for my time and trouble that is. Raffolk seemed to understand the notion, and instead started talking about the parade of the Day of the Crown, but just as any of us were about to say our piece on the matter, he bolted off down one of the side-streets. Melvin, Ignis, and Riniya all took after. Raffolk seemed mighty speedy for one of his Halfling stature, and other than the Elf, they didn’t look like they’d be able to catch him. As for myself and Dande, I suggested we’d take another route, as to encircle him and acquire an explanation for his sudden running away. This would not be the first time I’ve had to chase down a witness, or even a suspect. I prefer to use my brains over brawn of legs everyday, and I know quite a few of these narrow alleys. Or at least where they will eventually lead.

As expected, Raffolk came out of a side-alley to one of the larger roads, likely hoping to disappear within the crowds of everyday traffic. But then the odd thing happened, with his back to me and Dande, he changed his shape and appearance to that of a regular Human, slowing down as if he figured no-one had noticed. This is what perpetrators often do; they get too cocky and careless. And rather than outrun me, they’d have to outsmart me. Besides, I have others that are plenty capable in the running department. We apprehended him to ask, though tiny alarm bells were already in motion in my mind. I suppose my intuition should have been clearer, when he refused the direct (and cheaper) payment of his debt, but it now became very obvious that we had been conned. Upon closer examination of the grandmother’s feather which Dande had held onto, it became clear to me, that it was not of the same pattern or quality of the first feather, instead this was the feather of a large parrot, which of course wasn’t rare at all in comparison.

We handed the illusionist over to the guards, though he claimed ignorance. Thankfully, and perhaps much to the chagrin of Raffolk (if that truly was his name), the guards and I have a long history, as I have aided them on several occasions in cases regarding magic. Although I could not outright prove the perpetrator’s guilt, I could at the very least ensure that one thief would be locked away; enough witnesses at the Lucky Leap would be able to back our explanation for a possible conviction. As the Lord Monder was one of those witnesses, the guard wanted us all to follow them to the Lord’s villa in the High District. Upon arriving at the villa, we were greeted by a servant, before the Lord himself bid us enter. Only our Minotaur seemed unfazed by this wealthy abode, while Melvin seemed even more nervous than normal. Reasonable enough, given Melvin’s background.

As I had feared, the Lord Monder had not in fact been visiting the Lucky Leap that day, and he had not been looking to acquire such a feather. Clearly, at least to me, this whole ordeal was a large setup. Lord Monder suggested it to be the work of the Golden Masks, a band of thieves known for using illusions and disguises in their crimes, and apologized for the loss of our coin. I personally could have cared less about the amount, and while I’m certainly not vindictive, I do not like to be schemed or conned.

Perhaps seeing us all as a cohesive unit, Lord Monder then asked if we could perform a small task for him, he did recognize my name, though I don’t believe he knew the others. The task sounded simple; acquire the Lord Monder’s horse (named Miss Ivory) from the villa of Lord Romlyn just south-east of the city gates, it shouldn’t take much more than an hour by foot. I knew at once that something was amiss; this task was much too easy for a band of six adventurers to partake, there was a hidden agenda beneath. Not one for secrecy, especially not when it comes to my work, I pressed him for the truth of the matter. He caved, and admitted that there were rumours of dark rituals, foul magic, and other types of witchcraft being used out near the Royal Stud Farm, so if we were to “come across” any of that, we were to root it out, if possible.

I’m always happy to improve my standing with the guard, and the Red Cloaks too, but I’d understand if the rest of the party was less than enthused about partaking this job. Fortunately, there were but a few complaints and questions, and we would be able to depart for the villa, as soon as the Minotaur reacquired her gear. Heading down the road, an eerie sight greeted us in the horizon; plumes of black smoke rising from where the villa would be. As we closed in, the entire place, every single building, was set ablaze. We hastened towards the front entry, where the corpse of some poor fellow was laying in a pool of blood. His death was certainly not caused by the fire. Some of the others heard the panicked sound of a horse, and rushed towards the barn to aid the creature. We were all left with the same questions; who could have done this, and, perhaps more important, why?

Microphone etiquette

When chatting with people through a headset, whether it’s a group chat, a video-game or a D&D session, there are several things to take into consideration. This is a MUST in order to maintain a good feeling for everyone involved. If you are finding yourself frequently in such a situation, please, invest in at least decent equipment. Good headsets are expensive, but changing your microphone habits is free of charge. Here’s a couple of tips that you might not know of, that can improve the experience of chatting with you.


Plug in, THEN connect

This is a really, really small thing, but please, PLEASE, plug in your microphone and head-set BEFORE you connect to the group chat. Connecting to the chat before you plug your audio-set in, cause the audio to crackle and pop. Now, that might not sound bad when you’re reading it, but in this case, it’s usually right into people’s ears (as they, likely, are wearing headphones). The closest comparison is at a concert, where the guitarist plugs his guitar into the amplifier, but instead of the speakers, it is right into your headset.

Microphone distance

Microphone distance is the distance between your mouth and the microphone. Depending on the microphone type, this distance can make a big difference. If you’re using a headset with a microphone arm (that you slide down in front of your mouth), you can’t really do much about this, so look through the other tips here, and see if there’s something else that you can do. If you are using an ear-phone headset (typically like the ones that you get when you buy a new phone) this distance is crucial, as these microphones are typically not of that great quality, and aren’t really designed for much more than a short phone call. So if you’re looking to play a +3 hour D&D session, you might want to reconsider your choice of microphone (of course, if this is the only microphone that you have, then it is better than nothing). Ear-phone microphones are usually attached to your shirt with a clamp, this typically means that the microphone distance has limited edit-ability. A part of the microphone distance is also if there is anything between you and the microphone, this is often the case with ear-phone microphones, as cloth can fold and move and block sound-waves to the microphone.

If you are using a tri-pod microphone (or other self-standing microphone, that isn’t connected to your headphones/speakers) getting the right distance can be a little more tricky. Blue, the creator of the Yeti Microphone, generally advice you to be around 40 cm (15.7 inches) away from the microphone, but it can often be hard to maintain this range, if you are to sit/stand at the same distance for longer periods of time. This distance also depends on your general volume of speech. If you’re in doubt about this, try reading the same 5-10 lines of text at different distances and/or volumes. The right volume and distance can be a bit hard to determine, but if you have a way of listening back to what you just read out loud, for example an audio-recording program, you can test how you sound. A general rule of thumb is; if you think you’re too loud, others probably agree.

You can use Audacity, which you can download for free here: https://www.audacityteam.org/
if you don’t have an audio-recorder to sit in your current computer.

Behind the scenes

When we go behind the scenes, people use microphones in, roughly, two ways; push-to-talk and just leaving the microphone on the entire time. Whether you use either is completely up to you, both work just fine. Push-to-talk often requires you to set a specific button, which, when pressed turns access to the microphone on, and until you press that one button, your microphone is considered as “muted”. The other options means that you just have to keep quiet, and this tip is for those of you who does this, in particular.

Depending on the type of microphone you’re using, the microphone will have it’s own set sensitivity, typically the higher quality of microphone, the higher the sensitivity. A high sensitivity means that the microphone is great for speech or even music, as it makes your voice sound closer to “the real you”. This in turn also means that your microphone is surprisingly better at picking up noises, even if they aren’t that close to the microphone. Keep this in mind, if you have to do other stuff while in the chat. You microphone is on, so things like eating and drinking can, potentially be picked up. The common courtesy is to actively mute yourself, so that no unwanted sounds sneak into your important business meeting, or your DnD session. If the chat have got a text format as well, you can always excuse yourself. This of course requires some understanding of when to leave the chat; timing is key.

When to talk (and when NOT to)

In a group chat you are not alone, this means that knowing when to talk (and when not to talk) is alpha and omega. Some people can naturally go off and talk for hours on end, some people just love to hear themselves talk and some people can be quite shy. This is why most group chats have some kind of moderator or chat “leader” (in DnD, it SHOULD be the GM). If that person is you, try and give everyone room and time to talk, some shy people remain shy throughout the entire thing, while others may “warm up” and get more into it after a while. Also make sure to keep people on track.

If you feel that the chat moderator isn’t giving someone enough time to speak, let them know in private after, if the overheard person is going to appear in ongoing chats, it could be important to make them feel more comfortable. In the same turn, if you are the moderator, listen to the people taking part both before and after, and take their requests into consideration.

Behind the scenes, part 2

Almost none of the people you’ll meet, have the perfect background setting (like an audio recording studio), and expecting people to have the perfect background for recording is unreasonable. Many streamers (on Twitch, for example) have sound-proofed their walls, which can help with noise reduction from other sources (if you live in an apartment-complex, or have thin walls). This can however prove to be a rather expensive (and even unnecessary) upgrade, and as I started this post off with; changing your microphone habits is free, I will try and give recommendations that won’t cost you a dime.

There are however a couple of things that you can at least consider. You can’t change how you live, obviously, but you can take some steps towards making the ordeal less of a bother for everyone else. For example, if you live with room-mates or someone else, and they are present, you need to tell them to quiet down. The most obvious solution would be to have different rooms, preferably with doors that are at least somewhat sound-proof, but again that isn’t always an option. In that scenario having an agreement with your room-mate(s) can make it a much more agreeable time for everyone involved.

Another thing that you can do is, depending on where you live, making sure that you can block sounds coming from the outside. Some people live near a busy street, some in an area with lots of grass-mowers. These are amongst the most common background noises when chatting with other people. Notice that microphone quality comes into play here as well, a “good” microphone will have a higher sensitivity, and thus be able to pick more sounds up.

The Food & Drink issue

We all know the problem; you’re set for a, possibly, several hour long meeting via head-set, it goes through one of your regular scheduled meal-times. So what to do? In general, food and eating does not go well with using a microphone, in particular a tripod microphone with a sensitivity. Using push-to-talk can, in this instance, be a temporary solution, but try and keep your mouthfuls small. Or, ask if the meeting can take a short break (you probably won’t get the time to cook and dine, but it gives an opportunity for a light meal, like a sandwich), after all, the others taking part in the meeting are human too. Some people can eat silently, but not everyone has that gift. Unfortunately a lot of people are, rightly so, triggered (read, annoyed) by the sound of someone slurping or sloppy eating. As mentioned a couple of times now; remember to think of the other people that you’re chatting with.

Drinks are a bit of a grey area, because while it is admittedly easier to drink quietly, than eating most types of foods, it is generally advised to, if possible, keep it away from the microphone. Some people, again, just can’t take sustenance in a quiet manner.


Do you have advise or situations that you wish to share regarding chatting through microphones? Let me know.

The Quest for The Holy Grail, take two – A D&D Adventure in Monty Python’s Arthurian setting

After the defeat to the French at Castle Aargh, an exhausted King Arthur Pendragon returned to Camelot with the few remaining men, but with the plague still at large, the French soldiers lurking and many a strange monster roaming sbout, Arthur had no choice but to let most of the Knights of the Round Table go. Arthur’s hope was that the Knights would at least go and fight evil in the name of the Britons and the Round Table, but Camelot’s treasure was not able to support yet another full-blown campaign. As it turns out, having not been at his seat of power, and allowed the Knights at Camelot to turn it into such a silly place, meant that the coffers were all but empty.


But Arthur was never one to admit defeat; just think of what historians some thousand years later would think? Gone were some of his best men, Sir Galahad presumed to be dead at the bridge in scene 24, Sir Bedevere were captured by strange folk at Castle Aargh, Tim the Enchanter had also returned to the Badlands, and Sir Lancelot’s whereabouts were currently unknown. Sir Robin was also gone, but that thought didn’t really cross Arthur’s mind. There were bigger problems in his rather undefined kingdom. Now scout reports told of a strange appearance, apparently coming in from the sea, the highly invasive Swedish Mรธรธse had already made a few simple settlements along the coast. Further north, the savage tribes had been more bold in their raids on the villages, possibly spurred on by a change in leadership. Arthur was in need of two things, well, three, if you count the Grail, but those two things were men, to storm the Castle Aargh if needed, and money to pay said men.

Arthur’s problem was obvious; no men meant that no-one was out collecting bounties to fill his coffers, and without money, he could not supply men to go out and hunt for these bounties. But then, when Arthur was at his lowest, having had yet another fairly one-sided conversation with God about the aspects of a good groveling, an angel appeared before Arthur. Arthur was quite dumbfounded by this, as the angel wasn’t wearing any clothes. The angel spoke to Arthur, who was staring rather intently, as it was turning colder outside (Arthur did not have the money to renew his rockwool membership). “Arthur, King of the Britons, I am Saint Victor, God senteth me to aid thee, so that thou would stop thine moaning of his name in vain. I am contractually obligated to inform thee that,” in that moment, the clouds parted and God, fairly cross after dealing with several flocks of coconut-carrying African Swallows, said, “GET ON WITH IT!”

Saint Victor then informed Arthur of a stone circle some days east of Camelot, here would he find, if his faith was strong enough, a band of strange travellers who would be willing to help his cause, without promise of pay, but Arthur might had to assure them healthcare, after all, it was no-longer the 800’s anymore. Arthur’s mood brightened to a smile, and hastily he strode towards the stable where Patsy the 2nd were sleeping; this was his chance of reassembling the Knights of the Round Temple, get revenge on the French for their insults and, FINALLY, obtain the Holy Grail.

Best D&D moments, part 1

Dungeons & Dragons can be the source for many great laughs, here’s a collection of my best ones. I hope that you will share your best/funniest D&D moments with me. Warning: Explicit content.


“I think I know what it is, I have it right on my tongue, let me taste to be sure…” One of the players, after a failed nature check, picking up a pile of bat-poop.

The players (all level 3) was searching through a burned-down inn, when a single Ogre discovered their less than stealthy scavenging. Combat ensures, one player gets hit with a javelin for 15 damage, but as the players mostly stay at range, they defeat the Ogre pretty easily.
DM: The Ogre gurgles and falls over on it’s back, dead as a stone.
Player: I go closer to it.
DM (thinking player wishes to loot): The Ogre doesn’t appear to have anything other than it’s javelins and it’s loincloth.
Player: What gender is the Ogre?
DM: Uhh… (thinking) It is male… Why do you ask?
Player: What would I need to roll in order to place an incense-stick into it’s urethra and light it?
DM, slightly disturbed: Uhh… I mean… The Ogre is dead, it’s not like it would require a roll to do that… but… Do you REALLY want to do that?
Player, already describing the scene in detail: Yep!

The party is trying to break into the manor of a certain L. GaGa, in order to steal a priced dagger. Knocking out the guards, and dressing up as them, the party entered the kitchen, under the guise of inspecting for poisons (party Cleric is a Dwarf, Dwarves are resistant to poison damage). Entering the pantry, the party rolls perception check to see if they can find anything of interest.
Cleric: I rolled a natural 1.
DM: You spot a massive wheel of cheese, a keg of ale and a long string of smoked sausages.
Cleric: Screw the dagger, this is the REAL treasure!
Later, the party enters a seemingly empty room, another perception check.
Cleric: I rolled a natural 20.
DM: You see all the traps and a chest that is licking it’s tongue, preparing for a meal.
Cleric: MY SIGHT IS POWERED BY SAUSAGEEEEEEEEEEEEES!

A low-level party is trying to avoid alerting all he goblins within a stronghold. The Tiefling Warlock reads through the description of the spell Thaumaturgy (which is a cantrip that Tieflings get at level 1).
Warlock: “So… It says I can slam opened doors shut, as well as open an unlocked door instantaneously…”
The Warlock then proceeds to slam the door, till a single Goblin notices the commotion. Once the Goblin gets outside the door, the Warlock shuts the door behind it, and the party, all holding actions, goes in for the mauling of this Goblin. This pattern continues about 3-4 more times, until only unarmed Goblins are present within the room.

Amongst Silk and Rubies

Miguel grew up amongst luxuries, his family owning, through straw-men and other contacts, several businesses around the wealthy dock-city of Chynllau. The family fortune had been secured by Miguel’s great-grandfather, who was a gem-cutter, but later came to own a workshop. Through a number of schemes and crafty business plans, Miguel (I) established a smaller emporium over the trade of gemstones.

The de Pechรฃo house-hold was seat of many meetings, both with other merchants and nobles, but also with ship captains, mercenaries and other less pleasant types. If something could used to the family’s favor, it almost certainly would, and any threat towards the family or their businesses, had a tendency of disappearing and not be seen again. This dubious craftsmanship continued under Miguel (II), who established a personal bodyguard, as well constructing a vault for holding wealth for emergency needs.

Miguel’s father, Miguel (III), started to cut off the more dubious parts of the business, focusing more on his family and estate on the outskirts of Chynllau. Miguel (III) taught his son, Miguel, the wrong-doings of his forefathers, but also ensured his son to be proud of his heritage.

Miguel (IV) learned from personal teachers the basics of running finances and being an upstanding citizen. In his teens, Miguel pursued a love-interest, but was shot down, with the point being that he was “too boring”. The easily-influenced Miguel took that to heart, and decided to become that which he found most exciting at the time; a user of magic. Spending a significant amount of wealth and favors on not only books, but also remedies and artefacts, Miguel was studious and ambitious, his primary teacher, an elderly Elven woman, had praised him for being a quick-learner. Her main ideal was to use magic for the sake of fending for one self, as such the School of Abjuration was her prized subject.

At age 18, Miguel was technically supposed to be made ready to take over, but to his father Miguel’s surprise, Miguel handed that mantle to his twin-sister, Luisa. Miguel asked to travel the world, on one of the family ships out of the port. And so, the next week, after making a few preparations, Miguel set out on the seas to find love, knowledge, wealth and favors.

A Herbalist’s Notes, part five

We finally discovered something that helped our spirits a bit. A couple of Aarakocra scouts had spotted our group, and offered shelter and food for the evening, as their village was nearby. The winged Aarakocra flew up, and lowered down a basket, big enough for one person. Our Tabaxi guides were the last to be raised up through the leaves.

We asked if the Aarakocras had a map, to which they shook their heads, they rarely went down to the undergrowth of the jungle, picking most of their fruits from the canopy of the jungle. The Aarakocra village had about twenty individuals, the younger ones appeared to me as frightful; this was probably the first time they had ever seen anyother creature than their fellow Aarakocras. We asked if the village had a leader, but was only met with heads shaking. From what I could gather, this wasn’t as such a tribe, but rather a couple of families living together. Venerable Pieros, Ioun bless his soul, would have been overjoyed, I’m sure.

The next day we left the treehouses, with extra supplies of fruits among our food. The stay with the Aarakocras had lifted our spirits slightly, but we soon found ourselves back in the slump of the undergrowth. We passed bubbly hot mud-pools, turning the air humidity into a dry and unpleasant smog. Our remaining guards were on edge, naturally, and our Tabaxi guides seemed friendlier with eachother, out of the necessity for survival. There were several sounds almost all the time, some close, a nearby bush or a low-hanging branch, and some much further away. We could hear two, or more, sizeable creatures in a fight, but never saw either of them.

Out of a starting expedition of a total of thirty people, nine had perished so far. Including Pieros, another scholar, I never caught her name, disappeared from the group within the first couple of days. Aside from that the rest of the casualties were the guards and Don Kelprys’ personal guard. The remaining people were still largely divided between those supporting the Don and his quest for treasures, and those supporting Captain Mirra in making it out alive again. Unfortunately those in favor of the Don, was the ones paying for the entire expedition. As scholars, the remaining people were less than adamant in stating support for one side or the other. On the one hand, the quest for new knowledge and discoveries, was a scholar’s plight, but on the other hand, that knowledge would never reach anyone, if none of us made it out of the jungle alive.

A couple of muffled cries told the demise of two more of the guards, one of the others had seen what looked like a humanoid reptilian appear from out of a murky pool, throw a net onto the two guards, and pull them under faster than they could call for help. Their swords and the dragging marks was the only signs left of them on the muddy surface of the jungle. I can only hope that their deaths were swift and painless.

Even if the hopelessness of our situation should steer more people against the Don, the jungle did it’s part to obtain the balance between the factions. The guards were the most exposed to the dangers of the jungle, they kept the front and sides safe, but this also meant that they were first in line, if anything meant to attack us. And the guards happened to be the largest group that was, mostly, against Don Kelprys.

I decided to try and swing the balance amongst the scholars, so the next evening at camp, I gathered up the others. Some of them were easily swayed, amongst them a young Halfling, who already had had several close calls with the dangers. Others were still on the idea that if we just waited, eventually things would resolve themselves.

Val’Kiroth’s letter back home

Written in a very neat hand-writing, in the Draconic tongue.

Dear honoured father and mother
When this letter reaches you, I will have been on this journey of mine for several weeks now. Let me first start of by admitting a smaller lie on my part; I didn’t just go on this journey to find new trade networks for our family’s mine and for Farranin’s betterment. I have in secret been studying magic, though no-one else in town or at the manor, should be aware of this, to my knowledge.

I have made sure to keep it a secret, as I know your stance on magic is one of distrust, and I do not blame you. If you disown me everything from our family, I will stand fully understanding to your choices. But know I that will still work towards the enrichment of Farranin as well of the continued wealth of our family and that of the Giemerac family.

I partook the journey partly to discover what I could do with magic, but also to use my knowledge on behalf of our town. Alas I have not yet made any connections with regards to trade, but I have made a decent amount of money from my adventures through the towns of Neverwinter and Phandalin. I plan to, when I make it back, donate as much as possible to our family and the town of Farranin.

I hope Earrys is doing well, if her marriage is coming up, I’d be happy to pay for a gift befitting the first-born of the Amblarex family.

Once again, I apologize for deceiving you, I never wished to harm anyone, which is why I asked for a task of this character.

I long for the familiar walls of our beloved manor, as well as the company of you, my honoured parents.
I remain, truly, your son.
Val’Kiroth Amblarex

The Lost Mine of Phandelver, Val’Kiroth’s Journal

A first-person experience of a D&D 5E campaign

With the prisoners out of their cells, alive and well, all things considered, I turned to ask my rather brusque companions on what our next course of action should be. As I did, I noticed that our height-imposed musician, had vanished completely. I even asked venerable Gloriosa, as the short one seemed to be quite content with running behind her well-armoured rump, whenever anything unsavory would poke it’s ugly head forth in our direction. Alas, even she had not seen him run away, and she had not seen (or heard) if any creature should have crept up and gobbled him down like a morsel.

As a jest, I suggested the idea that he might have hid in one of the coffins, as there was a distinct lack of barrels here. Maybe he had hid and attempted to prank us, and then closing the lid, only to realise his lacking strength, being caught inside the coffin. Still, no muffled cries of distress cam from the coffins. Somehow it made my mood drop into a sour area, while his antics were annoying and obnoxious, to the point where even I had been tempted to test his “barrel” against my magic, I suppose it was sort of a strange friendship. And while brave would be the last thing to call him, his heart was still in the right place; helping those less fortunate than himself.

Meanwhile I as pondering my honest feelings towards our short friend, the smelly Half-orc and the strange Elf had found an old armoury. Spears, swords and crossbows. And a lot of bolts. Most of the weaponry was crude, but solid looking, it wouldn’t break easily, even in the hands of someone untrained. I took the finest of the spears, weighing it in my hands. The balance was good, I remembered the annual boar hunts my father would host for the miners, some would be clappers, some would guard the flanks with these heavy spears, in the case of the boars charging in. The main group would be equipped with crossbows and longbows. At the time, I found a hunt like that barbaric and pointless, but as my father pointed out, the following feast, where he would sit next to the common mine-worker, listening to their grieves and troubles, served the business that the mine was well, by keeping the miners happy. I had the idea that if I could provide extra bolts for the hunt next year, I could partake in the hunt as well. This would surely make my father proud of me.

We left the manor with the woman and her daughter, it was hard to tell exactly how long the two had been held captive, but they both appeared in good health. For some reason, my gut told me that more Redbrands were en route to the manor, I loaded up my crossbow and said that I would guard the two women to safety, while the others would drag the well-beaten mage out. Their intention was to hand him to the town, for them to sign out a fitting justice, though I had concerns; no building looked fortified like a jail. And unlike Draig, who seemed just as unfaced by bathing as by death, I have standards regarding ethics and punishment, the call for an execution would go against my beliefs.

While looking out over Phandalin, I noticed that more people were out in the streets than when we headed to the manor, none of them with the notable red hoods. It was a pleasant change, as none of the people appeared fearful, almost as if they knew we had taken care of the Redbrands. The mage spoke word that concerned me, even if the Redbrands wasn’t the best lot of people, if they truly were the force protecting Phandalin, things could go downhill very fast for this community. Perhaps venerable Gloriosa had the same line of thought, or she just read my mind, but she suggested we used the weapons in the armoury of the manor, to arm up the citizens; creating a makeshift militia. Even if we didn’t have time to train them in the usage of the weapons, just the sight of visibly armed people could fend off smaller groups of thieves and brigands. As I had snatched up all the bolts, I felt a jolt of guilt hit me, but I couldn’t just leave this place defenseless. So while I waited with the woman and her daughter, the others went in to obtain the remaining weapons, and the knocked out mage. I can’t imagine Draig’s shoulder to be comfortable, to say nothing of the grime, dust, dirt and blood I have no doubt would be smeared in layers upon it.

We were informed that the knight, that we saved from the Goblins, was at the Townmaster’s Hall, and we figured it was the closest to a government or leadership this town had. The mage was still out cold, I suppose the rough-housing the others gave him earlier did have some effect. Sildar wasn’t exactly pleased to see the mage, and when I inquired into the mage’s claim of him being “an old acquaintance” of Sildar, he seemed reluctant for a moment, before he told us of the mage’s past as an errant trouble-maker. He did applaud us for keeping the mage alive (and for gagging him, which had been a suggestion of mine), he was handling a heavy bag, which turned out to be our reward for rescuing him earlier. I figured the plans to arm the citizens were better left with Gloriosa, who had been very charismatic and adamant in that request, which was part of why I agreed to part with most of the bolts. Meanwhile, I headed in to talk with Townmaster, and obese, but short man. I had hear others mentioning him as a banker, so I figured this would be a good chance to make a connection between my father’s mine and the general trade routes near Neverwinter.

Alas the Townmaster turned out to be the kind of person, who should NEVER be in charge of other people’s investments and money, and most certainly not be their head figure in terms of political achievements. He kept misspeaking about the town’s funds as “his own”, to a point where I suspected he was trying to line his own pockets, rather than making the town a better place. I calmly informed him that we had dealt with the Redbrands, and he asked if we had found the money they stole. I told him no, no stash of money or other riches were found, all that were there, was the coins from the gamblers’ table in the cellar of the manor, 20 silver pieces. I counted them up and pushed them across the table. He frowned, informing me that the Redbrands had stolen heaps more, though I had a feeling that he was trying to scheme me, or my party, of more wealth. So I bid him farewell, with a vague promise that we would take care of some Orcs south of Phandalin.

With all of that debacle settled, we headed to the estate of a certain Alderleaf. A farmstead, as it turned out, in a rather poor state, but with a decent amount of land for crops next to it. Seeing as our musician and joy-bundle was missing, I stepped forth, my tongue may not be silvered, but it would be better than Draig spouting angry spittle at a common farmer. Gloriosa might have turned it into a religious lecture, something I could do without at the moment. And mister Aspendew I wasn’t sure about, but as it didn’t occur natural for him to step up and introduce our cause, I am of the firm belief that I did the right thing, in telling the others to let me handle this. For once, no-one complained or argued, quite the refreshing change.

The door was barely opened for a woman to look out, but not letting us enter or look inside. I understood her situation; in her stead I would have done the same, seeing such a well-dressed, fine-scaled, horn-embroided Dragonborn at her door. She informed us that she didn’t know the location of the castle herself, but that a friend, who was a Druid out of Neverwinter, most certainly did. I thanked her, despite the minuscule amount of information. She told us to be wary of her sound, who could be quite the rowdy kid, and as if on cue, a young boy came swinging a crude wooden sword. Naturally, a boy with little hope for the future, would turn to swords and violence first, before thinking of knowledge, books and numbers, despite the fact that the town probably could do well with someone of intellect, rather than savagery and the ability to cut of heads. But the boy admired Draig. Not even the somewhat refined Aspendew, or the well-mannered Gloriosa, despite her slightly fanatic approach to certain things. I just shook my head, and turned away. At the corner of the next house over, I spun to look at Draig handing the little boy his two hand-axes, trying to teach him how to throw them. I murmurred a silent prayer to no god in particular, that Draig would never deliver children into this world, no shins or kneecaps would be safe.

Finally they finished up, I heard the boy calling Draig “sir”, a title fit for a knight or a guard commander… Draig was as far from any of those as any of us would be. I asked if we should procure a wagon to head to a locale called Thundertree, which was where we could expect to find the Druid, but neither Sildar nor the Townmaster, the greedy fop, had a wagon we could borrow. Sildar suggested we ask Barthen if we could use the ox-cart in which had arrived. An excellent idea; it had not been long enough for Barthen to sell cart or oxen on. It turned out Barthen had made some small repairs to the cart, a couple of cuts from a Goblin scimitar here and there, I presume, but I gladly paid the small fee he asked for, unlike the smithy on the other side of the street, Barthen seemed a reasonable man of commerce. I went behind the shop, to prepare the cart, whilst the others had some unfinished items they wished to trade with Barthen about.

Finally they all came around, Aspendew went to pet one of the oxen, I tried to warn him that they didn’t particular enjoy being petted on their rump, but it was too late, the otherwise calm creature launched a kick to his stomach. And it was is Aspendew had seen himself mad at the ox for this; he started questioning what we needed a cart for. I thought that he was playing a jest, surely he could not be suggesting that we were to WALK to Thundertree and back. But soon it dawned upon me, that he was being serious. I looked to the others, but found little support in my reasoning. After some pointless bickering back and forth, we decided to sleep the night, and head out first thing in the morning. We talked about going straight to the castle, if possible, though I have preferred to head to Thundertree first; another settlement with potential trade to be made. But I was outnumbered in that regard too. Oh why, dear father, must I surround myself with religious fanatics, murderous savages and an Elf so much in love with walking, that you’d think he’d be married to a pair of good hiking boots.


Heading north we discovered the castle Cragmaw; a mostly ruined set of walls and towers on top of a hill. As we had slept, I had dreamed of a visit from the same fleshy wall as from my past, I woke suddenly in the middle of the night and looked below my bed; a strange, humid book was placed there during my sleep. Flipping through the pages, I found incantations for some powerful spells, most interesting I must say. Aspendew called a glowing owl to his aid, for a second I hoped it would land a smelly bird-poop onto Draig, but no such luck was had. Instead the owl flew over the castle ramparts, and Aspendew looked blankly up into the sky while it did. When it returned, he informed us, poorly, that the castle was in fact occupied, with smaller and bigger types of Goblins. His owl had also spotted a ruined part of the northern wall, that seemed lightly manned. We kept our heads down, mostly, as a single patrol passed by. We agreed to silently take out the next patrol to pass, giving us a free moment to enter the castle unnoticed, hopefully.

Listening at a door, Aspendew informed us that multiple voices were in there, however we didn’t manage to enter without sound, and soon the clashing of swords and armour echoed through the corridors. Draig took point, I could see him swing at something through a door, as he moved forward I followed, only to be utterly clubbed down by the ugliest Bugbear I ever saw. The next few minutes are hazy to me, I remember getting up, and being cut down again by a dark-skinned Elf. As I came to, from Gloriosa’s friendly voice, the others had barricaded the tower room, with an unconscious Gundren amongst us. And a beast of some size roared from the outside of the castle.

The Faceless Dream

I woke to find myself bathed in sweat, the cool air of the mountains chilled my spine. But in different way than I was used to. It wasn’t the winter months, and it wouldn’t be at least three more weeks till the first snow would start covering roofs and land. It was a different feeling, something felt… wrong.

I tucked a sheep-woolen robe around me, at this point, I feared my scales would fall off like icicles. The dark of my chamber told me the time of day; pitch black, it would be several hours till sun and the light of day would appear. Perhaps I needed something strong, to calm my nerves. I sat on my bed for a couple of minutes, trying to accustom my eyes to the dark of night, I could make out the nightstand next to my bed, but not much further than that. On top of the nightstand stood a thick wax candle, I had used it to read the past evening. A small copper bowl was placed under the candle’s base, to keep the wax from dripping.

I took it with my left hand, while opening the drawer to my nightstand with my right. I was sure that I had placed the tinderbox in there, but it wasn’t there now. My window had it’s curtains drawn, the fabric felt stiff and cold in my hand. No moon or stars lit the night sky, but I didn’t remember it as being cloudy when I went to bed. I had to find a light-source, if I wanted to make any progress in our manor. Fortunately my honoured father’s study was in the room right next to mine, I knew he would have a tinderbox in there, and that the study wasn’t usually locked.

The door to the hallway opened with a silent gasp, and for a second it felt like something big had rushed down the long, carpeted wooden floor. I held my breath, gathering my courage and looked out. But the hallway was just as dark as my room, and there was no sound of… something, going down into the lobby. With my right hand on the wall, I slowly fumbled my way to the study door. Father had been very specific about every piece of furniture in there, as well as the door, with the handle in the shape of a small dragon. The metal was cold to the touch, freezing, almost hurting in the very instant my fingers embraced it. I could see my breath as small clouds coming from my nose and mouth, as I pushed against the door.

The study had no windows, so the only light-source in there would always have to be a candle or a lantern, if the fireplace in the back of the room wasn’t lit. For this reason, it struck me as very strange, when I felt a short gust of icy wind rushing out between my legs, as the door was opened. I shuttered and squinted my eyes to peek inside. There it was, the tinderbox, right on the corner of my father’s study table. I rushed over, and lit my candle, putting the tinderbox away in my robe.

When the light was struck, I looked around, all the bookshelves had a fine cover of… frost. And inside the fireplace was a lump of snow, which would only be possible if the wind had been coming from a very specific angle. Shivering, I left the study, my father did have some alcoholic beverages in here, but those would be the finest vintage and most pricey drinks, so the thought of indulging in those would never occur to me.

The flickering light from the candle spread throughout the hallway. I immediately noticed that the door to my parents’ bedroom was open. I lurched closer, silently, as to avoid disturbing them. I couldn’t hear breathing coming from in there, so I pushed open the door. Their bed was empty, but from the look of their bed-covers, they had both left recently. I looked around in the room, but nothing seemed to suggest why, or where, they would have gone.

Heading downstairs, I found the door to the servants’ quarters had been knocked outward, and was now laying on the big, round carpet in the lobby. My father would not be pleased with this. I peeked inside the quarters briefly; no sounds and no-one appeared to be concerned. It was then that I noticed some deep claw-like marks by the door-frame, likely the cause of the door not being in it’s rightful place. I traced down the rough markings, the thick lumber, from which most of our manor was built, had been cleanly pushed in. Something very large, and undoubtedly very strong creature had made these marks.

The kitchen was a mess, plates had been torn out of cupboards, drawers broken apart and all my mother’s fine silvery had been scattered across the floor. This room, just like any of the other rooms, had a laying of frost on every surface. Where the kitchen looked as if a war-band had just been through on a raid, the pantry was surprisingly untouched. It didn’t take me long to find not only the alcohol belonging to the household, but also the private stash of our kitchen maid, Kirona. I had initially sought to let my father know, but despite Kirona sometimes being rather tipsy, she, as my father so boldly would proclaim; “Was the best damned cook for miles.” And I wasn’t exactly in disagreement with him on that note.

I had swiftly grabbed a tankard from the mess in the kitchen, and placed it on a shelf to pour. I had selected a half-full bottle of brandy. The cork was a bit stubborn, but finally it gave way, the pleasant, sharp scent of the brandy quickly went to my nostrils, already making me feel warm inside. As I took the first swig, a loud crash came from the lobby. I stowed the bottle down next to the tinderbox, and went to look with the candle in my left hand, the tankard in my right.

The double doors to the lobby and out in front of the manor, had swung open with some force, but no-one appeared to be waiting. I wasn’t much for leaving the manor, but when I looked out over the hillside, I felt I needed to investigate; footsteps, all leading away from the manor, through a fine layer of otherwise undisturbed snow. I collected and donned my good walking boots, and began to follow.

The footsteps would lead towards the village and in between the houses, never was there a set of prints heading a different way, always moving in unison. I had seen the village at night before, usually, there’d be light in the windows here and there, in particular the tavern, where those who had ended a late shift in the mine would usually spend the night. But there were no lights on. Every house, hovel and street was dark, cold and empty. I noticed a couple of open doors, but decided it better for me to not look in. More footsteps joined in with those from the manor. And they were all heading towards the entrance of the mine.

My candle had almost melted down, when I got to the foreman’s office. With it’s interior looking just like the kitchen; ravaged, as if someone… or something, had been searching for valuables or other items. In the last remaining light from the candle, I found a filled lantern that wasn’t broken. The lantern didn’t provide warmth as the candle did, so I poured myself some more brandy to balance it out. The foreman also had extra working gear, rough and primitive as it as, it would ward of the freezing cold better than nothing.

There was no snow inside the mine, and with the multiple shafts branching out as new veins were discovered, it was a labyrinth of caves, carved by hand for profit. Many times I would stop to listen, but apart from my own heartbeat, it was as silent as the grave. I had been walking for about an hour, always descending deeper into the earth, when I heard it. At first it was distant, like a deep, humming song, but as I got closer, I realized that it was a choir of voice, in a language I could not comprehend.

I turned a corner and almost dropped the lantern in shock; before stood every man, woman and child from the village, as well as my mother and father, with their backs to me. They were all facing a wall that didn’t look carved. It looked… alive, like a writhing mass of stone tentacles, slowly twitching, twirling in a mesmerizing dance. A deep, strange voice echoed in my head, the voice was powerful and I stumbled to my knees. I could not understand the voice, and it seemed to get louder as I didn’t answer. Finally I manage to scream “What do you want?!?!” and the voice stopped.

Everything went dead-quiet in that moment, and now the congregation of people began to turn towards me. Slowly, one by one, they would turn in their stead and look at me. But to my horror, their faces were… blank, well… gone. No mouth with which to talk, no eyes with which to see. The same was the case with my parents, no faces, just an empty wall of flesh. And yet I felt them staring, it was clear that I had interrupted something I was not meant to see. When the last person had turned their faceless head to look at me, the mass of people all reached a hand toward me and pointed at me. The wall-creature behind them made some kind of sound, and now they began to slowly approach. I instinctively held up my hand to stop them, and as a I did, a skeletal figure emerged from my palm, grinning it’s toothy skull at me, before blasting against the mass of people, knocking several of them down like a gust of wind against a stand of reeds.

Terrified, I screamed. And then I woke up. For real. My heart was racing, my bed soaked in my sweat. And in my clasped fist, was a tiny ice-crystal on a chain. In my head I heard a friendly humming, beckoning me to put the necklace on. And I did.

Starting your custom DnD campaign – goblin encounters

For DM’s who wish for a smooth start to a new campaign

There’s nothing quite like starting up a new D&D campaign, getting together with new or old friends. But especially for new DM’s setting the balance for the difficulty of the first encounters, can be a bit tricky.

The classic starting foe, is to many campaigns, the regular Goblin. Please note that there’s nothing wrong with using the classic monsters, but to more experienced players, this choice might be a bit boring. As a DM, you are the one telling the story, whether that is an official Wizards of the Coast story, that have been told thousand of times before, or if it’s a custom campaign, where you’ve meticulously written down why birds fly and how grass is green. If a monster makes sense in regards to the story, then you can be pretty sure you won’t get many complaints.

But let’s take a closer look at why Goblins are a preferred foe to start with. First off, we’re looking at their Hit-Points (HP). Here the standard Goblin clocks in with 7 (as per standard Monster Manual). 7 HP is enough to survive a hit from most one-handed melee weapons and ranged weapons, and usually it’s enough to survive the starting cantrips as well. Already here, the Goblin is a good choice. Because while the players can see their attacks hit and do damage, the Goblin still provides enough of a challenge, that all enemies aren’t just one-shot-kills which would ruin most of the idea about an encounter.

Goblins are versatile in their standard choice of weaponry; a scimitar and shield for melee and a short-bow for ranged. Seeing as both of these weapons rely on the DEX modifier, Goblins have a +4 to hit. This is where Goblins are a bit of a handful, especially if the party is small, or doesn’t have more than one semi-tank character. While their damage output isn’t amazing, they more often than not, hit the target they are fighting.

When looking at a Goblin’s armor, it have a leather armor and a shield, totaling up to an AC of 15. Most magic users, bards and rogues are usually below this, at level 1. Here it’s important to notice that the Goblins, just like anyone else, requires two hands to use a short-bow. If the general rule is to be followed, this means that they cannot be using a shield effectively, while shooting or rather between shooting. As such a good balanced encounter with Goblins can go as following:

4 player characters (PCs)

4 Goblins

“Three Goblins have their scimitars at hand, two up front, ready to engage, one slightly behind, looking how the fight is turning. The fourth Goblin is even further back with it’s short-bow loaded.”

If the two in front engages, the third will likely have time to decide (through you as the DM) if he wants to get in close or begin to change weapons into a ranged. The ranged Goblins might have their shield on their backs, or right beside them, but they are not using it, so remember to remove 2 from their total AC, bringing them down to 13.

While the ranged Goblins might seem the bigger threat, because the party’s melee-focused characters can’t get to them straight away, the biggest threat to the players is actually in the Goblins that you decide go for melee. With the combination of an AC 15 and a +4 to hit, not even a Fighter in Chain-mail and a shield (for an effective 18 AC) can feel at ease. Whereto the lower AC of the ranged Goblins means that they can be taken down fairly quickly.

If you want to make a Goblin encounter harder, you can make use of the Goblins’ ability “Nimble Escape”, which allows them to not only disengage, but also to dash or hide, just the like the Rogue of the party would at level 2. This makes the ranged Goblins even more dangerous, as they can use the Hide action to essentially, unless in fully open terrain, vanish and make themselves a lot harder to hit.